An hour and fifteen minutes floated ethereally by Friday evening as my sister, mom, and I absorbed stories. We agreed with nodding heads in the common knowing about life and family, smiled at his high dimpled embarrassment, laughed out loud at his family's antics, but we also fell silent and our breath stopped at his pain. They were stories...just his life stories. Stories from the life of Pat Conroy, author of many great books including one that became a movie many people, at least my age, would remember, The Prince of Tides.
Okay, admittedly his stories had southern charm, and he was cute in a way that only a nearly seventy year old Irish man can be depicted. But the human heart bled from the hate he bore from endured abuse by his father, and yet our hearts along with his heart were cauterized by his discovered humanity within his father and by the miraculous arm of forgiveness wrapped around his father near his death.
At the end of his telling, there hung that compelling moment that needs a response larger than a thank-you clap for what he remarkably and candidly bore from himself. My heart wondered as the clapping began if I should give a standing ovation for such authenticity. And before I knew it, there stood my sister, quickly followed by the remainder of the room.
Upon reflection, I don't give these ovations readily or often. What was my criteria? Mr. Conroy certainly moved me with his passion and commitment to his story. And for that, honor should be bestowed. Moments that inspire us to look beyond ourselves at life's humanity and overwhelming gifts should be marked with such level of gratitude. Why be selective? Many have posed that in the frequency, the standing ovation becomes weakened in its significance. My measure will not be the frequency but rather the connective inspiration of the human spirit.
Seeing the extraordinary among the ordinary.
Returning military commanders in ancient Rome whose victories did not quite meet the requirements of a triumph but which were still praiseworthy were still celebrated with an ovation. And I am inclined to think that I should give standing ovations more readily and frequently because I do see much extra in our ordinary. There is much worthy of praise. I won't count these as routine, but my ovations will mostly stand among the common.
Ovations for common ground for when a person pursues context over conflict...for common valor when a person pursues peace patiently and persistently in the face of pain rather than give in to the compulsion of defeat or to destroy...for common ground when the kid still stands at the sidelines at practice and encourages his teammates after being eliminated from the glory by injury...common occurrences such as the policeman who gets cursed and spit on, lied about, and taken to court for protecting a person from himself and defending justice for others...for common effort for a son who isn't number one in his class but gets straight A's in honors and AP classes because he motivates himself to be prepared and study every day at school to his best for an uncertain future...for common friendship whose intuition to call a friend just might be what saved her life that day...for common love of an animal whose life alone gave joy immeasurable... common looks for a daughter's cheeks that will always quicken a kiss and a smile...for common jobs for a son whose hard work made his dream come true...for common pain when a husband perplexedly learns about a spouse's Alzheimer's disease and then patiently nurtures her soul. My ovations stand among the common but are no less extraordinary.
And strangely enough during the question and answer time that evening, I received a text from a student who wrote this humbling standing ovation to me. While the girls basketball team was rising to their feet, the ovation humbled me to my knees in gratitude that He who is for us in gift and life pours those from us for others to see:
"Hey, the basketball team is watching the movie Mighty Max and the freshmen are all saying the awesome main character lady reminds them of you and I kinda agree. She's really strong-willed and committed and strong in the faith and a great leader so no wonder she reminds us of you. We love you Mrs. Roberson.---the basketball team."
Why not give standing ovations to more than World Series winners and great musical performances? Why not decide to give standing ovations for devotion to worthy endeavors of the human spirit that God embedded in all of us and are standing among our common day? Why not decide to stand for living these type of moments?
STANDING OVATIONS TO YOU WHO DECIDE TO BE DEDICATED AT ANY MOMENT TO THE ART OF LIVING AND LOVING WELL.
Comments
Kim
I second that. I enjoy so much your writing about our night out. Being together with you was special. And yes I thought the same thing, wanting to stand up but not for sure. It was a moving night in so many ways for me. And your writing brought it all back home. Most of all was the text from the basketball team. We are sending you our standing ovation. Keep the hand moving. I await your posts everyday. Ma